I remember everything. The pains, the struggles, the frustrations that you had to endure for my sake.
Its
not that I don't love you, no, not at all. I love you so deeply and so
strongly that there is no normal and physical way for me to express my
love.
I wish I can run and hug you whenever I see you
but all I can manage is a simple smile. I want to tell you all the
things I love about you. I want to cry on your laps again. I want you to
tell me stories again. I wanna be your little boy again.
You
know me like the palm of your hands. When you look at me, I never miss
your thoughts hidden so carefully in your eyes. The events of my birth
and struggles of my childhood, your little boy then is now a Man. I
have promised to pacify you with all my love and all my talents. I want
to write a new chapter in our lives. It will be the creation of our
hopes and dreams.
I want you to see the world in a new
light so different from the one we are used to. I want to see that
smile you had when I first walked and talked. The excitement and desire
and hopes of our paradise.
It is my sacred duty to
ensure your well being now. When I was still naive, I resented you for
being poor. I bought the propaganda of our society to marginalize and
label people who are different from us. For this sin, I am deeply sorry.
With
your gift of focus and my power of imagination, I have already created
our future like we discussed. I am laying the foundations now so please
wait for me. I feel your love right here. The over hundred miles
separating us hasn't reduced your love intensity.
For
the first time, I am truly happy! I won the battle against myself. Mum,
I am so proud of you. Do you know that I become pumped up with new
energy when I remember those days? I am a new man now. You are my
inspiration and role model. I am already successful because I am as
happy as you are!
But there is more. I just realized
that I am classified as a gifted person. I now understand my behavior
and character. Now that I know why I am the way I am, I have accepted
myself and that's why I am happy.
How do I explain to people that because I have an unusually high IQ, I have low EQ?
I am now learning to love my weirdness. Mum, no matter how I think about it, I believe you are the best.
I
love you with every color I can imagine, I love you more than the
multiverse my mind can conjure. You are the foundation of my reality and
a touch light to my long dark journey of freedom and creativity
You
always wished me luck. It makes me remember the times that you used carry
me at your back for Gold Searching at the river banks. I was 2 years
old but I remember. I cant forget.
Thank you so much my Love.
Your son,
AMfree
